Yesterday M1 dropped boytoy off at MEPS. For those that don’t know MEPS is the Military Entrance Processing Unit. Located down the street from where I work, it is where the recruits for all services start their paperwork for basic training. He was sequestered after 4pm and could only talk to my daughter via phone. I warned them both it would be hard and to NOT break any rules because it would end badly. I assume they listened as I did not hear anything bad this morning.
So last night M1 was supposed to have both babies for an overnight. I was in the mall getting new sneakers for M2 when she got the call. M1 stating she was “stressed out of her mind do you think Mom will take both girls?” M2 just about lost her mind. First of all this was her “alone time” with Mom and one of the few times where she actually has my full attention and because sneakers are VERY serious business for M2 so how could M1 be “so rude”. I took the phone and asked what was up and she said that Baby S was crying and Baby S was climbing all over things and that she “keeps stepping on my scar and it hurts”. No I cannot take both kids, I did it for 7 weeks and no I am done. She gets pissed and hangs up on me. OK whatever.
Then my phone starts to light up it is boytoy. Why won’t you help her, why can’t you give her a hand, she is struggling so much now please do something….I want to scream. It is not my job to rescue M1 when you and her made a whole series of awful choices. However, since I am responsible for Baby K I will go and get her if M1 wants me to. He texts back “no she wants you to take Baby S and she wants to keep Baby K.” OK no I am not going to stay up all night. You wanted to have another child and you agreed to parent by yourself while he went to basic so no. Yes saying that killed me but I also explained that I cannot be up all night and then go to work in the morning as I had an important meeting to attend (which is true). A bit of time passes and then he texts “M1 wants you to get Baby K”. Its been 4 hours that she has had both of them by herself, 4 hours.
When I get to the apartment it is a wreck and M1 is stressed out of her mind. Her eyes look crazed and she is twisting her body back and forth almost manically with Baby S trying to get her to stop crying. Baby K is on the floor yelling and boytoy is on Facetime trying to help. I take Baby S from her and calm her down and get her to sleep. M2 gets to Baby K and gets her to eat some food and then get dressed to go to Gramma’s house. Baby K readily complies and happily eats blueberries while M2 puts on her shoes and jacket. M1 stares with ice cold eyes and says “Why does she always eat for you? Why doesn’t she quiet down for me?” I don’t answer, I know that look and no point in responding. I leave her with a quiet house so she can focus and get some laundry done. Baby K falls asleep in the car on the 15 minute ride home and is so asleep I can take off her jacket and carry her upstairs without her opening her eyes.
In my heart I knew she could not handle it. I wanted to be wrong but no I was not and that hurt too. I am not sure if she feels like a failure and given her rudeness to me when I dropped Baby K off this morning I am not going to bother her the rest of the day. I worry and pray it will be all right. I am scared it will not be though for either of them.