Today my parents came to visit my house and spend time with Baby K. It was the first time they met boytoy and I have to be honest they were not impressed. They were quite cordial to M1 though and treated M2 and N the same as always. There is a new dynamic now with them and their oldest granddaughter and it was a bit tense.
My Mom was good about asking to do things like hold and feed Baby K. M1 was not overly concerned about who had the baby or when but my Mother tried to show her that she had a say. Recently M1 was on Facebook and lambasted J and my Mom thought it was me she was trash talking. Once I was done laughing I told her no it was boytoy’s Mom. My Mom took it in stride but suddenly she sees a different side to M1 that has been there all along but she never saw before, the whole “I am entitled” piece. She voiced a concern about M1’s mental health and I said yes we were trying to address it.
I found myself shoved to the back again as I am often when I do things for M1 and the family. I did not want to take the spotlight from M1 and Baby K but part of me is still looking for my parents approval and so when I am in the back watching events I coordinated happen and I am ignored, well it hurts my feelings. I know do the right thing for the right reasons NOT for the recognition but still having them all in my house was uber stressful and yet it seemed like I was not even a critical piece when they all interacted.
Baby K did her part and looked adorable. She was up a bit so my parents could interact with her and I was happy for that. It is tough with babies after all to get their schedules to gel with the life events going on. M2 and N were super helpful both with my parents and the baby so overall the weekend went smoothly. They did not fight with each other or M1 so I am pretty sure a miracle also transpired LOL.
Overall my parents seemed happy to be Great Grandparents and I know took perverse joy at calling out Grandma anytime they needed me. Sigh….some things don’t change. I did ask my Dad “What makes you a Great Grandfather” and he said “Because I am me” so we did have a laugh. He asked me if I felt old and I told him no so that was the answer he was looking for. He ended up not holding Baby K though I asked him several times. He kept insisting she was “too tiny” to be held so maybe he was concerned he would hurt her.
I was glad they came by and could see some of the references I have made about concern for M1 and the baby. I was glad they were happy and enjoyed time with her and was very glad that M1 and boytoy humored me and came over. An enjoyable visit overall and only a few jokes at my expense so I will take it.