The downside of soo much stress of course is that for someone like me who tends to internalize these things, well it has negative consequences. I now have a full blown cold and feel just miserable as M1 has returned and wrecked havoc yet again. Good news it is not between N and M2 it is between herself and the whole house.
We picked her up Wednesday. On Thursday she messages me she has to go to boytoy’s house because he cannot find the keys she left on the bench of his truck. I tell her it is a trap, a ploy, a manipulation and of course I get blown off. I ask her point blank “Why does it not strike you as odd that boytoy would drive 30 minutes to our house to pick you up to drive 30 minutes back to his house INSTEAD of just asking his Mom who he lives with to help him?” I asked if she could see how he was still trying to control her every move and keep tabs on her. She agreed but I am not sure if it is because she just wanted to shut me up or if she really understood.
Friday at work I get a phone call from M1 in hysterics boytoy is threatening to kill himself because she tried to break up with him, she has to go immediately to see him. I tell her no she needs to call the police. If he is suicidal she is NOT a counselor and if he is truly suicidal he needs a hospital not her. She goes on and on about how unfair I am and finally when the police get there they tell her the same darn thing. Later that afternoon we find out he is at his sisters house and had shut off his phone for effect. M1 goes on and on about how she is going to see him, she has to be with him. I remind her that she said she broke up with him and she did the crying “But I have to know he is all right.” I looked right at her and said “Look if the hospital released him he is not suicidal. Again he is manipulating you and this is now the third time he claims this to get you back again. He is NOT suicidal he is manipulative. You are allowing him to emotionally abuse you and be emotionally abusive to you because you are so starved for male attention.” She stared silently at me and told me she was leaving her friends were coming. I reminded her that I needed her to be home on Saturday morning for the Civil Service test I had to take, she said she would be home early. I knew she was lying and made other plans.
Saturday afternoon she messages me, she and boytoy want to take the girls bowling as they promised they would do. I reminded her that she was 4 hours late and that we were now not home because when she flaked on her promise I had to send the girls elsewhere. Eventually we meet up and she takes them out. She tells me they will be back around 6:30. At 6:30 she messages me to let me know they are at a hospital because they picked up boytoys’ friend to bring him to see his girlfriend who is in the hospital. I remind her that she was ONLY suppose to take them bowling and to dinner and she claimed she had no control over the situation. Yay no kidding. M2 starts to have a meltdown as she is tired, in unfamiliar places and her sister is not paying attention to her. Poor kid can only handle so much and she starts crying. M1 calls me and I calm M2 down and tell M1 to get the kids home it is 7:30. She said they were going to eat. At 11pm the girls walk through the door. M2 flies into my arms and N looks guilty so I ask what is up. She tells me that M1 drove the truck to drop them off. I ask where boytoy was and she said that he was there in the truck. Three problems, M1 is legally blind in one eye and wears glasses for her remaining eye. She was not wearing her glasses. M1 has no permit to drive so she should not be driving. Problem three, she is under 18 and in NY you cannot drive after 9pm even if you have a license.
Sunday she messages me again and tells me she won’t be home at 3pm like promised because boytoy wants to make her dinner. I tell her we had dinner planned too and she does not respond. Around 6 she messages me again and asks if she can set up a TV in her room. I tell her no as I am completely opposed to TVs being in bedrooms. She pisses and moans about how awful I am and I remind her that as long as she was not paying for electricity she cannot add to my bill. She promises the world and of course I continue to say no. She gets pissy and decides to stop talking to me. Around 7:30 she said she is heading home and boytoy was bringing the TV anyway. I reiterated the answer was hell no and she refused to respond. She got home around 8:30pm and went to her room. I watched the driveway to be sure boytoy left the house and did not try to come in the side door. M2 went up to M1 and said to her “I feel like you don’t want to be part of this family anymore and you don’t love us cus all you do is see “boytoy”.” M1 blew her off causing M2 to retreat into my arms and cry some more. I shoot M1 a dirty look and tell her to go to her room.
Monday M1 messages me can she take M2 and N with boytoy to get her Halloween costumes? I thought they broke up. She assures me they are “just friends” and I remind her that she was suppose to be helping me with the girls till I got home in just about a half an hour. M1 said they could come and I reminded her that they could not be home late as it was a school night. She promises she won’t. I get a call 10 minutes later and M2 is on a rampage. She is yelling and screaming because “Why he always here. Why I not have time with you ALONE!!!!” She screams and rages on the phone. I try to calm her down and she hangs up on me. Fantastic….in training can’t leave….M1 calls me and I explain how M2 is upset with her because for the last few days all she does is pay attention to boytoy. She downplays me and I do a bit of reality check, is M2 raging right now? Guess what you caused this. M1 tells me she will talk to her and I can see the training is winding up. I gather my stuff quickly and go to leave, enroute my phone rings, M1 is calling she wants to let me know that M2 ran off and boytoy was chasing her down. I asked why she had not gone after her sister and she said boytoy would not let her. Really you are going to get on my last nerve like that?!?!?!
I get to the house and I remind M1 that she told us she broke up with him yet spent all her time with him. It clearly went beyond friends and that I hear her saying she has plans with him again tomorrow, makes me believe that they did not really break up at all. She swears they did and she would not be spending the weekend with him, well maybe just Friday so he can take he to dinner. Am I the only one thinking she is trying to scam me? I tell her she must make and stick with a plan to spend some time ALONE with M2 as it was destroying her to not have time with her sister and she promised she would.
OK you know what I did NOT miss this crap.