Adjusting as we g0

Where to start and where to end…sigh…not sure anymore. I talked to N’s workers and asked if I can switch M1 and M2’s rooms around. M2 and N are constantly at each other over stupid crap and when the both get sent to their rooms, well that is asking for yet another melt down. Both signed off and I agreed to put in some safeguards.

I told the girls they could move around and they were happy. N looks done with M2 and M2 HATES being downstairs for whatever reason. We start the move of crap loads of stuff and they are mostly helping each other out. Suddenly I hear a shout from downstairs. N is yelling at M2 because some clothes of hers were outside the closet off M2s room and N was sure M2 was going to steal them. I go down and assure her this is not the fact. I tell her I will put them away and immediately she starts screaming at me at the top of her lungs.

OK look I am sick still and out of patience completely. I tell her I am done and walk upstairs before I lose my crap from exhaustion. I sit for a bit and try to breathe ( I have pneumonia) and calm down. Soon M2 resumes carrying her stuff upstairs and M1 talks N down off the proverbial ledge. They go back to work and I just try to clean around the growing mess. I go to put M2’s bed together and I hear someone in the kitchen. I ask who is doing what and N says she is cooking dinner. Umm no it is not dinner time if you want a snack then get one not dinner. She yells at me again and says its too late she is going to eat it anyway.

Good news is that I cannot yell, since breathing too deeply causes horrific coughing jags. I look at her and ask what is up and of course more screaming ensues. I sigh and just sit there I can’t even engage it is too demanding physically. Eventually she screams out “I don’t even know how to be part of a family.” Oh thank goodness we got to the basic issue. We talk quietly for a long time and after I spend a lot of time explaining how it can be hard she finally calmed herself down. We changed topics then started talking about our upcoming trip to Disney. Ugg this parenting thing stinks at times.

We eat dinner and get some hardware for the bed which we need to set up. M2 refuses to help us do anything and thankfully M1 lent a hand (N was showering). We get the bed together and put it up when M2 has a complete melt down. I just walked away because honestly it was just too much. I half fall into the chair and just cough. M1, bless her, brought me the cough medicine and something to drink as it tastes super nasty. I thanked her and gratefully took it.

N finished her shower and asked to be tucked in. I came upstairs and Mocha, our lab snuggled into  my leg almost like “good job human no one got kenneled.” As I am petting him M2 came out and apologized for being an ogre. I tucked her in and kissed her head. I am hoping she sleeps well and is in a better overall mood since being up here with me is what she has wanted for a few weeks now. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if this put her in a better space so she was less nasty overall….nah…keep dreaming.

So tomorrow we have to set up the rooms better. Yep doing it in stages so I can keep up. Girls are being basically good though and do try to help when the illness seems to be winning. We need to set it up correctly because hey in three days I may or may not be considered for two more children. Yep that could still happen, I’ll keep you posted.

7 thoughts on “Adjusting as we g0

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  1. I think the takeaway here is that M1 tried to help you by bringing you a drink (empathy! Love!) and N was able to talk to you. It’s mom for the win. Tired, out-of-breath mom for the win.

  2. I was thinking of the same thing. In the midst of it, its hard to see the upsides, but wow, M1 to the rescue! Thoughtful, helpful, caretaking…that’s awesome! And the fact that N and M2 both apologized and were able to articulate their feelings, well that’s also awesome! I know it was rough, but you’re doing AMAZEBALLS!!! High five!

  3. my wife and I both had pneumonia early on after our younger daughter was placed with us. She was in the hospital for a week and I was dragging around trying to hold the fort – you should be proud of just being on your feet at all right now!! Hope you feel better soon.

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