Starting to feel real

OK so last night I went shopping at the warehouse store because I had coupons and was in desperate need of some basics. As I unloaded my very full cart all of the sudden it hit me….OMG I am preparing for more kids at the house….this is really happening. Yeah the anxiety hit hard at that moment and I tried to focus on ensuring all coupons were put on the belt.

My BFF and I walked a bit after and talked about a few small things that sometimes I need a reality check on. Was I nuts? Can I do this? What the hell was I thinking? What if it all goes bad? My BFFs response….did you take your anxiety meds today? OK OK I get it yes my anxiety is in over drive.

Today I find out that the paperwork for school is handed in. Yep probably need to take the anxiety meds more regularly LOL. I am hoping she gets put in M2’s class. I would love to not have her in a different district where neither of us knows anyone. At least in M2’s school I know many teachers, the counselors, the psychologist and the principal. I did give M2’s teacher a heads up just in case but really don’t know what they will decide. Keeping fingers crossed on that one.

I asked her worker if N could write to her family and she said no. She said she would explain later. I thought it was weird, she also said no to ANY phone calls to the family outside of her Grandmother…ok gotta be honest I am way curious now but must wait as she had to leave the office. N has been bugging to call her Mom or send birthday cards but apparently there is a reason why she cannot so we shall see.

Oh well, N was told yesterday that the discharge date is 12/23/16. In one of the emails from the worker the DSS worker said maybe we can move it to 12/17/16. I can hope right, there is only one small issue as that is also the day I meet her family at the twice a year mandatory visit. Might be a bit much for the day but heck I would take it if I can get it. N was over the moon with a final date. The counselor told me she told everyone she saw and met that she was getting discharged. I will take that she is excited and I am glad because I am too!!!

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