So it was inevitable, at some point I would be required to put on my big girl panties and tell my parents about N. I dreaded it with a familiar sense of dread. I could hear their disappointment, their disapproval and of course not so subtle insults to me. Now please do not get me wrong my parents love me to death, they do but my life is NOT what they planned and they struggle. They come around on many things but initially they struggle HARD.
Did you hear the utter sigh of disapproval last Thursday? Yeah that was my Mom as she saw this in her head as I told her about N:
Guess which path she was convinced I was going down? She is concerned because “those children have baggage. Those children have issues. Those children have trauma. Those children might disrupt your family.” A million times over she asked if I even for a moment thought about “your girls and the impact this would have on them? Did you even for a moment consider that?”
I had to bite my own sarcastic tongue so hard it bled, as M1 laughed her butt off as all she heard from my end was “Yes Mom, yes Mom. I did Mom. Mom I haven’t been impulsive in 46 years you must know this about me” I put her on speaker for a moment so M1 could hear the berating and her eyes got big. Yeah M1 and I am a grown up and this is how my mother talks to me. I know it will take time so I give it to them. I can’t understand their issues they can’t make sense of my life. I swear except that I look dead on like my Dad and sound dead on like my Mom I would question the shared genetics. But we are blood and so time is what they need.
M1 meanwhile was in shock. She could not believe Grandma would talk to me as if I was an idiot who was completely self centered. I smiled at her and said “Hon after 46 years I have learned only one thing from my relationship with my Mom, pick your battles” But M1 was indignant so much so I had to laugh but I reminded her I have had years of defusing Grandma, she has no experience at all. She was mad though that I don’t defend myself better but maybe one day she will understand, it blows over faster when I don’t fight, I don’t argue. I told her she just needed time and we would give it to her so she could process the information.
So now we wait. I continue as we were and in about two weeks they will call and it will be a truce. No not awesome but hey it is what it is. So they know now and God willing they will come around sooner rather than later. They are good though and I have faith so off we go…
It is time to call N…..