So I was talking to M1 today about the fact she is failing 5 of 7 classes and where is her work. She refuses to make eye contact so I cup her chin and all hell broke loose. She started flailing and fighting me like some animal. The sitter fortunately grabbed all the kids and booked up stairs as M1 tried to flip the table and throw a chair.
Now no worries, 23 years in the Army, 7 years in Martial Arts and 3 years in residential settings make me more then adept at restraints. Within about 90 seconds she was on the floor legs pinned under my butt and hands on the floor. She cursed and screamed how she is going to “hotline your F****** A**** tomorrow B****” I said nothing mostly because I knew what I wanted to say was totally different then what I should say. After several minutes I quietly said “You are threatening me because you want to feel in power and in control but I am not afraid and do not care what you tell people. I am in control right now and I will do what I need to in order to protect myself from you” A lot more cursing ensued, the usual you are not my Mom comments and my life sucks were wielded. Sigh whatever I am not impressed.
Once calm I let her go and walked over to the phone. I called the police to report a domestic incident and yes I did want to make a report. M1 still shouted “Fine call the F*****ing police it will get me the hell out of here!!” I smiled and said she wasn’t going anywhere, remember I was in charge. The cursing continued until the trooper pulled into the driveway then suddenly it got quiet. Hmmm guess you thought I was bluffing.
The trooper walked in and I let him know what happened. The sitter confirmed the story and M1 looked angry and terrified all at once. I admitted I put my hand on her chin and when the Trooper asked did it hurt she scoffed and said no so he looked at her quiet plainly and said “So you attacked your Mom because she touched you?” M1 grumped that “I don’t want her touching me at all” The Trooper laughed and said “Your Mom can touch you. You cannot assault your mother. You are wrong here not her.”
He went out to the car and M1 started to cry about “poor me just trying to stick up for myself” Really that is the route you are going to take? You violently attack me for no reason and now you want sympathy? Umm no it is not going to happen. The Trooper walks in just as I am saying “What did I tell you was going to happen when you were 14?” She muttered “You weren’t going to take my abuse anymore?” The Trooper looked stunned and asked if she had done this before and M1 answered “Well yeah but she never called the cops before” The Trooper looked right at her and said “You need to get it together you are in some serious trouble today and I am going to encourage your Mom to get a PINS petition” More tears flowed but it wasn’t because she regretted her actions, she was regretting consequences.
The Trooper handed me the paperwork and said “Take this to the PD and file the petition. She thinks her life sucks now, wait until more adults are dictating her existence.”
Part of me wants to part of me not so much. I will have to think about this long and hard.