Committing to a decision

I talked to M1 and M2 about adopting. How many? What gender? Are they really ok with it? Have I mentioned lately I love my kids because I really do.

I talk to M1 first because its easier to be honest. She wants three more kids and one her age please. She would like  boy and some girls but acknowledged with her sexual acting out that “you probably won’t get a boy because of me” Ummmm yeah you are right about that since you can’t control yourself I will control your ability to procreate under my roof. A couple of things I will not have and one is an infant in my house. Sorry they make me dead nervous.

I then gather up M2 and try to talk to her. God bless her she struggles to understand. She wants “about 100 more” when I say “How will we fit them in the van?” she thinks for a moment and says “Me and M1 ride on the roof” I laugh and remind her that winter is coming. She wants “maybe 5 maybe six and no boys because M1 might try to sex them” Ummm yeah baby I am on that too so no we will not have older boys. She offers to sleep in my bed with me to make room for more kids. I laugh to myself and think nope that is not going to happen either you are a bed hog.

I talk it out with my BFF and she suggests 2. Her reasoning is sound…if I act as a respite for Little Man and Little Bit when they return home, if they come back to care where exactly would I put them? She also pointed out that an odd number of kids usually leave M2 out as many kids tire of her. It makes sense, I can handle two and work with it often so I think ok two it is.

Agency contacts me and yes I will take up to two siblings. I am nervous and yet this is what I want to do. I think I am scared to succeed here. The agency tells me that it takes “about a year and a half to be successful” I can do this right?!?!?  I look at the information it says ages 3-12 any gender…well all right maybe not but we can work this out.

Next step formal application…

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