When it rains….

So yesterday I am at work and the phone rings. I pick it up and it is the counselor from the YMCA. My heart races is M2 ok, she freaks occasionally and runs when scared. The counselor said that the issue was with M1. What the heck..did she get hurt? The counselor talks in a measured voice

“Your daughter slapped another counselor in the face. She claimed she was horse playing but everyone involved said the staff corrected her and M1 swung at her.”

Now I am ANGRY, why in the heck did she do something so freaking stupid? Well it doesn’t matter I suppose she still gets 2 days suspension and I have to pay for private care. I to scream but I am at work so I just clench my teeth. How in God’s green earth does this child expect to become a counselor in training if she runs her mouth and now hits people. I desperately wish like I have so many times since she came to me that there was a drug for impulsivity.

I leave work and go to pick up Little Man and the staff in his play yard look stressed. Yep I know this look, what was it this time? Staff tell me he bit his morning teacher, ripped apart the classroom and kicked multiple staff and peers. I look at him and he refuses to make eye contact a sure sign he is guilty as heck. I don’t even know what to say and since I am already mad about M1 now is probably not the time for me to actually say something. I look at him and say “You are in trouble, we will talk at home”

I grab Little Bit and we walk to the van. I see a man hanging out in front of my van who I do not know. I hang back a minute, I am parked on the street so maybe he is just waiting to cross. The road clears he doesn’t move, he is looking around nervously. Well the bad news is I am angry so not the best judge of things. I walk up to him and say “Excuse me, this is my vehicle and I will need to move it so you will have to move.” He lifts his hand and I see he has a bag of pills of different sizes and shapes. Now I am pissed but also scared, he is a dealer and could be armed. Mustering false courage I say through gritted teeth. “Get out of here can you not see that I have children?!?!” He looks stunned but runs across the street and I pull away shaking scared.

I get to the YMCA and get the run down again on M1. I look at the head counselor and in front of M1 reiterate that her behavior is not acceptable and will be dealt with at home. One of her peers starts to mock her and I shot her the look of death. I said “And unless you want me to tell your mother what you are doing I would advise you to keep it to yourself” The peer stopped immediately, she did know I knew her Mom and that her Mom would NOT tolerate this type of behavior. M1 muttered at me “You are embarrassing me” and I shot back “How do you think I feel having to claim you after everyone saw what you did?”

We ride home in silence because honestly what I wanted to say to both was not what we would call “positive parenting” We pass a McDonalds and they all ask for it. I am shocked really you want me to buy you things after this?? I say “Soon as you earn it we will get it” Eventually I am calm enough to talk and we discuss what happened and the implications. Little Man looks truly regretful and per usual M1 looks defiant. Yep can’t win them all I suppose so I will take what I can get.

I dropped off M1 this morning at the babysitter with a crud load of work to do while she was there. Yep now she looks regretful!!

One thought on “When it rains….

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  1. My foster child is/was on Tenex and or intuniv for impulse. You might want to ask…. You are doing a great job. Keep up the great work

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